102 - Alive

Alive
By Kathleen Daly

"The Glory of God is Man Fully Alive"-Irenaeus.

Today I know
that Jesus Christ makes a difference in my life
that belief in him gives it direction, shapes it.

At times the focus on that fact is clear
mostly in retrospect
when the workings of the Holy Spirit become manifest
with a surprise insight

Showing me -
that the difficult decision had other than my thinking in it.
that love I gave, or received, brought life
though it meant many dyings
or because of them
that endurance in hope in spite of personal impatience
(which I have never been able to overcome)
was possible through strength not my possession
but gift in the situation
that prayer was there when words were not
that failure in myself to measure up could be forgiven by me
because another gave forgiveness.

Sister Kathleen Daly is a member of the religious order known as the Missionary Servants of the Trinity which gives special attention to social work in the inner city, including teaching. Last year she received a Master's degree from Union Theological Seminary and is now on the Executive Staff, Division of Overseas Ministries, National Council of Churches. In sending us this reflective poem, Paul Lehmann described it as "a statement of faith engaged in the struggle to be real both as regards the Christian tradition and as regards the integrity of the believer." We are happy to publish these lines, not only for their own sake, but also because Dr. Lehmann sees in them something of "my own knowledge of the kind of struggle toward a meaningful faith which Sister Kathleen has been going through."

103 - Alive

But most of the time the focus can't find fact,
is clearly fuzzy, and without a gauge.
Belief in Jesus Christ is sheer belief
clinging tenuously in unbelief.
Faith is nebulous uncertainty.
Hope struggles to be hope
not self-delusion, weakness.
And love-is it folly? Is this to be fool for Christ?
Or am I simply fool?

But then there are the times
when all is now
and life is life
when past needs not be judged for value
and future needs no sighting.

Then all the jagged rocks
that brought awareness of the human stumble
are gift
and recognized as Jesus.

And anguish
that had no speech except an urgent stuttering
is prayer
a litany of spirit.

And world
is seen in wide-eyed wonder, mystery
amazingly absurd
revealing humor to creative trust
and life is known in God

Whose hidden name becomes revealed
Life-giver… Freedom-bringer . . . Humanizer
Lover… Jesus!

And truth and hope and love and life and dance and joy
are free
and I come into being.