540 - A Poem For My Mother

A Poem For My Mother
By Polly Holliday

Velma, sacrifice of God,
Each day conformed by him
Into a richer sacrifice,
From your captive bed
You draw us together.

Lives meet that would not have met,
Actions ricochet around you,
Reality crystallizes before us.
God has made us captive
To your captivity.

When we turn you as you sleep
The rigid limbs soften
And your body flows
Like a sleeping girl
Floating underwater, cosseted by currents.

Irresistible, secret in sleep
Protected by sleep, spared
From the day to come.

Your dear body
Small and twisted now, sunken in your bed,
Still is beautiful when uncovered.
Ivory, with a shine along the curve of your hip.
You are beautiful in your stillness,
Like a flower that does not speak
Yet speaks.
Velma, sacrifice for me
The darkest days of pain are over,
You have entered your place of springs.

Only I know the sadness and fear
That encroach upon your bed when day comes.
I feel your knowing there is no going home,
I've seen your horror of limbs that will not move,
That lie like sullen strangers.

Polly Holliday has appeared in a number of Broadway plays, including All Over Town, Arsenic and Old Lace and, most recently, the revival of Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. For four years she played the character "Flo" on the television situation comedy Alice. She has been nominated five times for an Emmy award. Her film credits include All the President's Men, Gremlins, and Moon Over Parador. Her essay "Impressions from Backstage" appeared in the April, 1989 issue of THEOLOGY TODAY.

541 - A Poem For My Mother

In this prison of wandering thoughts,
Wounds closed, ache again,
Love lost, leaves again,
Spirits flown, return.

"I have to take Papa his lunch in the fields!"
"Mama is sweeping the yard under the old tree!"

But last night as we talked and smiled
To cheer ourselves and each other
We hit upon the words.
Bawdy words, earthy words,
A joke between women.
Words that never in our lives before had passed between us.

My laughter stopped as yours broke out,
Startling, loud.
Great haw-haws freed from deep inside
Erupted through your wide open mouth.
Eyes squinched, you lost your Breath,
Frozen in laughter,
Only to regain it and pour out more raucous haws
Like a crazy crow.

And with that sound
The imps and demons,
Cowards that had crouched around your bed
Waiting yellow-eyed for both of us,
Went hurtling backward, out of the room,
Up and out, tumbling through space,
Mad and screaming,
Clawing for a hold.

Darkness flew out and upward
And from your bed
Light exploded like shattered diamonds
Out through the walls and ceiling.
The black, overhanging trees
Lit up as when lightning cracks down,
White with no shadows.

And those laughing, shattered diamonds
Shot up, up and outward,
Arcing gracefully,
Fanning out into a huge flower of light.

And God looked down
And saw you,
Saw this jewel he had made through suffering:
A woman with a child's heart
Who laughs from a bed of stone.
And he longed for you.